Thursday, November 4, 2010

Rosetta Stone?

I have a burning desire to learn Latin American Spanish. Everytime we visit our favorite Mexican eatery, El Jaripeo, the motivation to learn surges forward. I swear I know half the language already. I can read most of the signs posted for Dos Equis and Modelo. The waiters call me amigo. I can kind of order beer in Spanish "uno cervesa, por favor."

Add in those nouns that require an a or o tacked on to its English counterpart plus everything I've picked up from watching boxeo on Telemundo (e.g. peso ligero) and I have have a great start. I'm almost fluent! Can I put together a complete sentence? No. Can I understand a conversation between two native Spanish speakers? No, pendejo, you cannot. You are not fluent. You can only effectively speak one language. Another embarrassed US citizen I am. Everyone else in the world can speak multiple languages, yet the prevailing xenophobic attitude in this nation does not deem it to be important. I feel ignorant.

So you know I'm all ears when it comes to a Rosetta Stone commercial. Although I'd rather take a pill, or have minor surgical modifications done to get instant Spanish, Rosetta Stone seems to be my best shot. Yes, I took the minimal requirement of 10 hours of German. I picked up a few words of Polish from my old neighborhood, and I even took an intense summer course in advance of my trip to Hungary. I did OK with Hungarian after a few days of immersion while visiting my cousins , but soon afterwards, I forgot most of it.

At least there are opportunities to hear Spanish spoken on TV and among a few of the East Side citizens. I could get the basics down and build by watching novellas on Univision. Rosetta Stone may be the way to go. All I need now is to find $600 and the will power to go through the course correctly. Then I look at some of the other projects I abandoned over the years and think of what I would do if $650 (price of Rosetta Stone plus the $50 that I think I lost yesterday) fell out of the sky. Right now, a set of Yoshi Blades and $570 worth of food sounds like a better alternative.

The other down side would be that after completing the Rosetta Stone courses, the folks at El Jaripeo would laugh and point at me saying that I talk with a thick and confusing Rosetta Stone accent.

Perhaps going to Mexico City, being kidnapped, and learning the language from my captors is my best bet.

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