Sunday, August 10, 2008
The Book of Follicles 3:16
Show me a study. I want to know what the connection is between hair and religion. From what I've seen, the wackier the leader; the bigger the hair. The Dalai Lama exists in bald serenity. Popes go with a conservative - what-nature-gave-me look. Islam and Jewish hair is often defined by the sect. Rastafarians . . . OK. Then you have these guys. They look like they've all entered a Conway Twitty look alike contest. Every one of them looking so much like retired rock-a-billy stars.
Why? Did market research show that potential flock members dig the look? Is it mandated by an obscure Old Testament verse? Does it hide their pointed heads?
Are guys with thinning hair inferior? Is the Antichrist as bald as a Babylonian baby's butt?
Although I never miss a chance to take a shot at the fraudulent and potentially dangerous glut of preachers with political and financial agendas, this is a genuine query. Hair like that can't be considered flattering and the maintenance expense must be crushing. Why?
Simply making fun of big assed preacher hair is like shooting paralysed fish in a very small barrel. It's this easy.