Saturday, January 30, 2010

Cell Phone Fun

Right now I can't find the thing. I received a call while at a friend's house and must have laid on his kitchen counter, It is 5:00 a.m. and I dare not call the number to see if it is there. Meanwhile, I'll relate an actual cell conversation I had. The uncensored converstaion follows,

Ring tone: John Lee Hooker - Boom Boom Breer breer breer breer der der der der der der der ♪♫

I answer.
Brother on the line: Whasup, Nigger?
Me: Say what!?
Brother: Wasup, Nigger?
Me. Do I know you?
Brother "Where you at?
Me: I don't think I'm the Nigger you're looking for. ( Should I have said this?)
Brother; When you getting here?
Me: You got the wrong number, fellow.
Brother. This ain't you?
Me: It's me, but not who you think I am.
Brother. Well, put on (couldn't make out name), then.
Me: He's not here either.
Brother: Who is this?
Me: Someone you don't know.
Brother: What?
Me: I gotta go.., man. Sorry.

Being addressed as Nigger, in an almost affectionate tone didn't bother me in the least. It sounded so right in this context. I mean, I call my friends bastards, , cocksuckers, pricks, and sumnabitches, during friendly conversations. It's a man thing. Let us speak freely among ourselves.

And another thing, do I sound like a Black man or does his friend sound like a White man? How else could he be convinced I was the party we was seeking?

This brings up another issue with cell phones. I am going to have to install an OEM Blue Tooth system in my Honda. (hands-FREE conversation, voice recognition commands, through audio system) Reaching for a phone while driving could be the end of me.

If I ever find my phone.

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